Life Sucks After You Die by Crystal-Rain Love

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

What do you get when you mix an incubus bite with a vampire bite? 

A shitastrophe. 

All I wanted to do was go to a bar and drown my sorrows in some alcohol, but I had to get attacked by an incubus. Now I’m being guarded by a hunky but oh so irritating vampire (who bit me too) while the incubus stalks me.

Being guarded by the sexy vampire probably wouldn’t be that bad if not for the fact my perfect boss has finally noticed me. Try dating while a vampire guards you way too closely and an incubus tracks your every move, waiting to pounce.

Then there’s some creepy hunter guy who also wants to kill me.

The sun wants to kill me.

Human food wants to kill me.

Don’t even get me started on my family.

Life sucks after you die.

Characters, Chaos, and Compelling Supernatural Intrigue

The following ratings are out of 5:
Romance: 💙💜❤️💚🩷
Spice/Steam: 🌶️
Chemistry: 🧪🧪🧪🧪🧪
Story/Plot: 📕📗📘📙📔
World building: 🌏🌍🌎🌏🌍
Character development: 😋😀😍☺️😎

Book Review: Life Sucks After You Die (Twice Bitten, #1)

Author: Crystal-Rain Love
Genre: Paranormal Romance

⭐ Character background and plot dynamics

Danni’s night at a local bar starts as an attempt to drown her sorrows, but it quickly spirals into something far stranger—and far more dangerous—than she ever imagined. After a balding stranger buys her a drink and she’s cut off by the bartender for being too drunk, she nearly topples off her stool. A handsome man named Rider steps in, guiding her to his booth and insisting she drink the coffee the bartender gave her. Before she can get her bearings, the man from the end of the bar confronts Rider, claiming Danni as “his,” and the two men take their argument outside. Danni, used to being overlooked by men, can’t quite believe any of this is happening.

Her self-esteem has never been her strong suit. Petite, flat‑chested, and constantly compared to her more “perfect” sister, Danni has spent her life believing she’s not enough. Even her crush on her boss, Dexter Prince—a wealthy, gorgeous player who barely knows she exists—comes from a desperate desire to prove her worth to her family. She was supposed to be out with her friend Gina to forget about Dex, but Gina never shows, leaving Danni alone and vulnerable.

While Rider is still outside, a blond man approaches her, claiming to be her cab driver. After sniffing her coffee, he tells her it’s been drugged. Shocked and confused, Danni follows him outside—only to collapse. He carries her to the curb, his eyes blazing with fire, and then he changes. Fangs, heat, violence. He bites her. Rider arrives just in time to fight him off, telling her she’s dying and he can save her. The blond man, Ryan, is an incubus who wants her dead. Rider is a vampire who wants her alive.

And Danni can’t make sense of any of it.

🌙 Highlights

• Danni’s stubborn disbelief feels painfully real.

Even after a brutal transformation and undeniable supernatural evidence, Danni clings to the idea that Rider drugged her and everything else is a hallucination. Her refusal to accept the truth goes on far too long, but it’s also understandable—she’s spent her whole life being told she’s ordinary, flawed, forgettable. Why would she suddenly believe she’s anything but?

• Rider’s jealousy adds humor and tension.

When Dexter finally notices Danni and asks her out, Rider’s reaction is priceless. His jealous comments bring levity to the darker moments and deepen the emotional stakes between them.

• The supernatural world expands quickly—and dangerously.

The more Danni learns, the more perilous her life becomes. Threats come from every direction, and the book does a great job of escalating tension as she’s pulled deeper into a world she never believed existed.

• Danni’s insecurities make her relatable, not unlikable.

Some reviewers criticize her low self-esteem, but given her family’s constant belittling, her self‑image makes perfect sense. Her desire to marry someone like Dexter isn’t shallow—it’s a desperate attempt to prove her worth to people who never valued her. That vulnerability made her sympathetic to me.

• The story is surprisingly addictive.

I picked it up expecting a quick read and found myself glued to the pages until midnight. I fully intended to stop after this book, but now I’m invested enough to continue the series.

🩸 Limitations

• The vampire lore didn’t fully work for me.

While the vampires are traditional in many ways—beauty, strength, longevity, sunlight sensitivity—their fragility felt off. The idea that they can bleed out from a small cut makes them seem weaker than expected, which undercuts some of the tension and mystique typically associated with vampires.

⭐ Final Opinion

Despite a few quirks in the world‑building, this book delivered far more than I anticipated. Danni’s emotional journey, her messy self‑doubt, and her chaotic introduction to the supernatural world made for an engaging, character‑driven read. Rider’s charm and jealousy added warmth and humor, while the constant danger kept the plot moving at a brisk pace. The story struck that perfect balance between drama, romance, and supernatural intrigue, leaving me eager to see where Danni’s journey goes next. I genuinely enjoyed this book and absolutely plan to continue the series.

Quotes

“What’s with my curtains?” I finally asked, conceding I wasn’t quick enough to come up with a snappy comeback.
“If someone has a gun or crossbow, it’s best they can’t see into your apartment.”
“A crossbow? Is Daryl Dixon hunting me now?”

“Barnaby Quimby is the Dean Winchester of hunters.”
“Honey, I’ve seen Barnaby Quimby and that fugly rodent is no Dean Winchester,” I said, earning a grin. “I can’t believe you know who Dean Winchester is, but you don’t know about Daryl Dixon.”

“I can’t believe an incubus and a hunter want me dead and I’m in my bedroom with a vampire who’s bitching about the absurdity of zombies. How is this my life?”

Blog|Goodreads|Facebook|Instagram|Pinterest|BookBub



View all my reviews